


Stronger Than You Think (Sequel to Dandelion Wine)

by Redheadclover



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Post Movie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-24
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:01:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26635534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redheadclover/pseuds/Redheadclover
Summary: I did have times when I wanted to go back and stay with them, to still love them both unconditionally.  Yet it was fate, and destiny, that tore me away from that life the three of us wanted.  We never saw it as unconventional or unusual, all three of us in a relationship together.  I loved them both equally, and they both loved me just as much.  It was all that I needed and wanted, and I never regretted it.To me, it was natural and it was real.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolo di Genova/Original Female Character(s), Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Kudos: 10





	Stronger Than You Think (Sequel to Dandelion Wine)

**Author's Note:**

> This is a small Sequel to the story I wrote called Dandelion Wine. 
> 
> I decided to have an interlude chapter from Adaline's point of view when she calls and gets a visit from Booker before she has her meeting with the others.

Here's the link to the story that this is based on

[Dandelion Wine](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26380579/chapters/64257223)

Enjoy :)

* * *

"Mom…are you okay?"

I looked up from my hands on the table where I had them perched, my hands were slightly shaking and were on top of a pile of papers from the recent doctor's visit.The words on the paper sounding so simple and so direct with my fate, but they were also heavy.It was set for what was going to happen to me and my life.

A small part of me was surprised to hear the news of my cancer, but another part of me was accepting it all together.

I looked over to see my son, one of my sons, watching me with concern on his face.Raj, in his early forties, took me to and from my doctor's appointment since my doctor was concerned about my head injury and driving.Of course, I found it all to be nonsense since I knew I was going to be fine with driving my own car, even at my age.But my son gave me one of those looks, and I knew that I couldn't fight with him.So I decided to have him take me and get things settled for me when we were back at the house.

"I'm fine, darling," I said to him, seeing his face etched with worry now since I was very silent and staying mostly to myself.I patted his hand with my spare hand and I saw him give me a small smileI watched his face, he was a perfect mixture of his mother and father.

From his father, he got his skin tone though it was a pinch lighter, his nose that I found adorable when he was a child, his laugh that was hearty and boisterous, and his chin.But from me, he had a splatter of freckles along his cheeks, his beautiful and yet delicate ears, and his bright eyes.His hair was dark with some highlights that were from me clearly, and he was quite tall like his father and his twin, but in the end, I found him to be perfect. 

"Are you sure?" He asked in his deep soothing tone, "It's a lot to drink in, and those doctors always throw a lot of their technical terms around—"

"Raj," I cut him off, seeing him go quiet within a millisecond as I gave him a kind but seen stare, "If your brother hears how you speak about doctors right now, he would be very disappointed,"Raj paused, almost sensing that I was serious about it.Though there was nothing stern on my face then, I knew Raj was a grown man and in raising him right I knew he meant well.Raj then gave me a look, almost seeing that I wasn't completely serious.

"Well, he's a pediatrician," Raj countered back in a hum, having me slowly smile at him and he then smiled too.I had to give him a playful scoff then.

"Don't tell him that," I commented in a chuckle.Raj grinned, his massive smile having me think of his late father and how he would smile in the same way and with the same twinkle in his eyes.it made me miss him all the more, wanting his presence there with me with this recent news.

"Mom," Raj said to me, his voice was a bit lighter now as we were calming down from our giggling session, "This is a lot to take in, and if you want, I can stay here with you for a bit so we can figure things out…"

"Oh my darling," I calmed him, seeing that he was already dreading having this conversation with me and I wanted to make it less terrible, "I don't want you to be away from Sarah and the kids.They need you at home more than I need you here, and I say that with love," Raj smiled, and I could still see the sadness on his face.I wanted to take away that look on his face and only see him with lightness and joy, the way he always was since the day he was born. 

I knew this was not just heavy on me from the news about my cancer but on my sons and their families.I had a close relationship with them all, I adored the two woman the would later marry Raj and Alexander, and not too long after that they gave me my grandchildren.They were all my blessings, something I would never take back for one second.

But now with this news, I wasn't just thinking about my immediate family, though they were important in this new life-changing event.No, another family was in my brain and their faces were haunting my mind since I was driven home by my son.

"I won't mind," Raj tried to reason, having me smile at him as he was trying to make some attempt in making this easier for me. "I can bring Sarah and the kids up here and we can have dinner together here, maybe plan a big birthday party for your birthday that's coming up,"

"That would be lovely," I said to him kindly, I couldn't help but feel warmth in how he was trying so hard to make all of this light.But it was there, that lingering thought of dread and uncertainty on the horizon for his mother and her fate now closer to death. I folded my hands over his, feeling the smoothness of his skin in comparison to my wrinkled hands and I patted his hands soothingly.

"Raj," I said to him, his name on my lips was so natural it felt like breathing, "It'll be alright.I know that this is harsh news, and no one wants to hear that their mother has…has cancer," I paused, seeing him slowly nod his head as he was trying to stay composed in front of me.He even looked down, having my heartbreak slightly as I placed a hand under his chin to have him look back at me. I grinned at him, showing no fear in my eyes and just love.

"I'm an old woman," I reminded him, seeing him watch me carefully, "I have lived a long happy, a happy life, and if this is how I intend to leave this earth, then who am I to intervene?What have I told you and your brother when you both were boys?With whatever happens in life and why it happens, what would I say?"

Raj paused, wrinkling his nose trying to remember.I would preach words of wisdom to both of them when they were so tiny and their hearts were so big for the world.I wanted them both to be good people in this world, have massive hearts to help others and to have a good sense of knowledge to know right and wrong.Jash was all for it, a wondering father to the both of them as he too was both firm but kind and fair in raising them.I couldn't picture having these boys being raised by anyone else but that man. 

"You told us that everything happens because of destiny," Raj answered, having me nod my head at him to show him he was right. 

"And this is what this is, my son," I explained, "This is destiny. I'm not afraid of what will happen, and neither should you and your brother,"

"I can't help it though, mom," Raj confessed, almost sounding defeated already in my fate that was already set in stone. 

"No one can help what destiny brings, my dear," I reassured him softly, "All we can do accept whatever destiny brings.It brought me my hardships in my past, but it made me who I am today because it all brought me your father, it brought me you and Alex, and it brought me a long and happy life.I'm am not afraid of death, I promise you,"

There was more than one reason for me not to be afraid of death, I have seen it far too many times before and felt it more than anyone could ever imagine.I kept that part of my life hidden away when I met Jash and when I had my boys.They didn't need to know all of the gruesome details of my life and what I went through, it would have been too much and too crazy.Hearing about the plenty of times that I was stabbed at, even a sane person would find that surreal. 

And not just with all of that I endured physically, but to tell them about the four beings that I traveled with and considered my family.They showed me how to live in a way that wasn't filled with fear or regret, how to have compassion to those who were less fortunate, and needed our aid.I learned to be tough and strong, to be smart and intuitive, but I also learned how to receive the love I never thought I would ever have.And for that, I had to thank two of those people specifically. 

Nicolò and Yusuf, the true loves that I have never forgotten.

"I'll call Alex tomorrow since it's a bit too late tonight for me to call him," I explained to Raj, "And from there, we can make a plan as to what we can do from here on out.But for now, we'll lay it to rest and not think about too much tonight."

"Are you sure?" Raj asked, sounding hesitant once more.I leaned in to kiss him on his cheek, sensing that he was afraid to leave me there in the house alone.

"Of course, Raj.Why don't you head home to see Sarah and the kids, you can tell her if you wish to, I won't mind.It would seem better for you to explain it to Sarah than from me.Trust me, it'll be okay and we'll figure it out together." I knew it wasn't going to be easy for my immediate family to accept my fate, and other people in my life as well.I had to start making arrangements and I had no time to waste.But I had to make it seem as though I was cool and calm in front of my son, I needed to because the last thing I wanted was to make Raj worry even more.

But I knew I had some work to go and some people to meet.

* * *

I watched as Raj waved goodbye from his Subaru Outback as he drove down the gravel road.It was a cooler evening, haring me look up at the rolling clouds in the sky for a brief moment.All in one day the rest of my life was already permanently set in one direction.But that fear that I knew I should have about cancer wasn't there, instead, I was content with it and letting it wash over me like a blanket or even the ocean waves in Malta.Once again, I remembered those two men….I remembered how they changed my life for good. 

I have never forgotten about Nicolò and Yusuf, not once.

The dreams I had of them both throughout the years were always so vivid and felt so real.Seeing their face and hearing their voices as if they were there and standing next to me, it was always soothing and calming to me.I knew I was never going to forget them, how could I?They both have been the ones that changed the way I saw my life from a curse to a blessing. 

I did have times when I wanted to go back and stay with them, to still love them both unconditionally.Yet it was fate, and destiny, that tore me away from that life the three of us wanted.We never saw it as unconventional or unusual, all three of us in a relationship together.I loved them both equally, and they both loved me just as much.It was all that I needed and wanted, and I never regretted it.

To me, it was natural and it was real.

Going back into the house, I looked over at the pile of mail that was sitting there, but there was one distinct package and was on the bottom of the letters.It looked securely wrapped and a bit battered, and as I moved the letters away to the side, I noticed it was the sie of a small block and secured with packing take.The calligraphy on the top of the package was more like a scribble, but I knew that writing from anywhere.Although shocked, I wasn't completely surprised.

Sebastian Le Livre.Or as I used to call him: Booker.

He would send me postcards from time to time, once or twice a year to tell me how the others were doing and how they were handling everything.I didn't mind the postcards and letters, it was a small check-in that he would do with me yet wouldn't give me a return address for me to respond.Booker didn't want me to respond, since he knew we were supposed to have space between myself and the four of them while I lived out my mortal life. 

He understood, really understood, that I didn't want to hold onto that pain.Booker didn't want to have any exposure or anyone finding out about myself or of them, which was understandable. Out of the four of them, Booker was the one that would be underestimated from time to time.But I knew his pain, I always knew about it and tried to help him from the moment we found him in 1812.He was reluctant to receive any comfort for us, and it took some time and effort for Booker to accept that I wanted to help him.

In return, he gifted me with this home that used to be one of our safe houses. He was even the one who mentioned that they could reach out to me, or vice versa if something drastic were to happen.It made me look at Booker with adoration and kindness, seeing that he was looking out for me and making sure I had a good step in the right direction when it came to staring my new life without them. 

Since then, there was a routine of postcards that I collected throughout the decades and I would hide away from my husband and sons.With those postcards, some of those messages were light and kind, and others were dark and laced with pain.And now it brought me to this package in front of me, taking it over to the kitchen table and opening the top with scissors and peering inside. 

A burner phone, still in its packaging and a postcard taped to the front.Taking both items out, I grabbed the postcard and noticed it was a picture of the Eiffel Tower and a sunset right behind it, a watercolor picture.It was beautiful no doubt, then I turned to see Booker's handwriting on the back and I read the message:

_Adaline,_

_I'm in Paris for a while, so I figured I sent a new burner phone in case you need it._

_I_ _'m separated from the group for a while, but I can't explain why at the moment._

_I made a bad decision and I regret it._

_Give me a call on this phone so we can talk._

_Booker_

A sense of dread was now over me, and the thought of my cancer was briefly absent in my mind as I got the burner phone out of the packaging and started to dial the number that was on the card.Thinking about Booker and something he did was weighing heavy on me.Booker was no saint, nor was he evil.He had a conflicted soul and mindset and for good reason.However, this was different since it involved the others and he was away from them, it made me think and my mind went to those dark places.

What did he do?

I placed the phone over my ear, hearing the ringing on the other end for a few long moments before someone answered on the other end.

" _Bonjour_ , Sebastian," I said on the other end.

* * *

**3 days later**

The sound of someone knocking on the front door broke me out of my trance as I looked up from the television set, watching the news that evening.I was curled up in one of my favorite chairs in my small study and my cat perched on my lap fast asleep.The sound startled me and the cat, who glared at me since her nap was disturbed.I tutted her, picked her up gently as I get up to play her back on the chair.

"Don't be snippy," I scolded the cat lightly as I walked out of the study and into the hallway, seeing the front door and the porch light on.I wasn't expecting anyone to come that night, and since I was on the phone with both of my sons and planning out the next steps for us to take with doctor's appointments.I also spoke to them about meeting with a lawyer to draw out a will and testament, which I knew would sadden them but I explained I wanted to be prepared in case anything could arise.It was a tough day and all I wanted to do was rest.

Not anymore apparently, because Booker was standing right in front of me.

He looked broken, just from seeing his face and how he was appearing to be wrecked.I haven't seen him in decades, and now that I was seeing him again, I wanted to be happy and grateful that he was here.But something inside of me was telling me that he was hurting and in pain.His body stance, his glazed eyes, and flushed skin had me realized that he was breaking himself up over something.It had to be serious since he would be grinning at me and hugging me at this point.But not now, he was almost swaying in his stance.

"Hello Adaline," he said in a low tone, attempting to be friendly with me.Physically, his face was the same when I saw him last, nothing changed and nothing was added on.I could say something different from how he was looking at me like a lost puppy who was kicked one too many times and now had his tail between his legs.He was trying to seem cordial, althoughI could read him like a book and see that pain in his eyes and his body stance.His hair was unkempt, his skin looked a bit greasy from a lack of hygiene, and there was stubble coming in on his cheeks and jawline.I couldn't scold him because I didn't know what happened, but I just sighed gave him a small glare.

"Are you alright?" I asked him finally, seeing him look down at his shoes on the porch and say nothing for a moment.As happy as I was to see him in front of me, this was not the best time for pleasantries apparently. 

"I did something horrible, Adaline," He said in a mutter.Hearing that tone in his voice already made me shift on my feet as I looked behind him out onto the driveway, seeing no car there.

"I took an Uber," he explained a grubbed manner, "I didn't think they would want rent a car to someone who was drinking,"

"That's considerate of them," I commented, seeing him give me a sad smile as I sighed and took his arm, "Well, before we can even talk you need to take a shower and get a good night's sleep.Come inside, I have a spare bed for you to sleep in so you can sober up, then we will talk in the morning,"

Booker came in without a word, closing the door behind him and having me already dread what he was going to tell me.

* * *

Booker woke up with a small hangover and an empty stomach early the next morning.I made both of us hearty breakfast and a strong pot of coffee for Booker to drink down himself.I wanted a better reunion for both of us, to have smiles instead of awkward glances and good stories instead of a bitter memory. But I didn't push him, I wanted him to eat first and drink down at least 4 cups of coffee before I knew he was in the right headspace to talk.It pained me to see him like this, but I wasn't going to say anything. 

"Alright, Booker," I said to him as I saw him drink the rest of the coffee in his cup while I was still nursing my one cup of tea, seeing him sober up real quick when I spoke, "As much as I'm glad to see you here, I want to hear what happened and what brought you here."

Booker took in a long breath, having me already feel the regret and pain he was about to give me before he even opened his mouth.I couldn't help it as I reached over to his hand my own, feeling how clammy his skin was against my hand and how he was slightly trembling. 

Booker told me everything.

* * *

By the time he was done with all of the explanation, I was stunned quiet and shocked to my core as I sat back in my chair, looking off in the distance.It was all so much to drink in and digest, even after we moved to the front porch as the sun was rising higher in the sky to breathe in some of the fresh air.I said nothing throughout the whole ordeal, Booker explaining from start to finish on what occurred. 

"My God," I said in sadness, almost seeing it all in my head.It pained me that it all happened to them, almost costing their lives in the process.Booker was heartbroken as he was telling me the story, knowing full well that he was to blame for all of it.He set up the trap with the ex-CIA agent, but things were awry when Nicolò and Yusuf were the ones who were taken, being tortured for their Immortality.That part pained me from the inside out, almost wanting to cry to think of those two loving souls being treated like lab rats at the hands of an unethical scientist and a mad man.

And in all of this, there was a new Immortal named Nile Freeman, a US Marine who was killed in Afghanistan while touring in a village.She as brought in as an Immortal in such a difficult and decimate time, which made my heart hurt for her to see the group go through this turmoil.And what was the most devastating to hear, even after they were all saved and safe, was that Andy lost her mortality.I remembered that sensation and that grief when my Immortality was gone, Andy must have felt the same way when it happened to her.

After Booker went quiet and I took a long moment or two to think.It was a lot to digest, a lot to try and understand, and now I was hearing it from Booker who felt so much guilt that it was physically making him hunch over himself.I finally looked over at him, seeing him hold his head in his hands and breathe out heavily, not even looking at me or having the courage to look in my eyes. 

"Booker," I said to his name once, trying to sound as soft and careful as I could.Booker wasn't moving or saying anything to me, almost trying as much as he could to not look.Maybe he thought I was going to shame him or scream at him for what he did, but that wasn't the very case at all.Of course, I was angry with all that happened to the other, including Nicolò and Yusuf.Maybe I should tell at him and scold him for what happened, a part of wanted to.

But I was calm.

"All I want to know is why you did it," I explained to him sincerely. Booker cringed when I asked, almost as if I slapped him but instead of my hand it was with my words.I didn't want to relish in his pain, but I was just curious.He looked away, tears were forming in his eyes as I could tell he was trying to breathe. 

"I needed a way out, Adaline," Booker said in a broken tone, sniffling a bit as I was looking at him in confusion, "I couldn't handle being an Immortal anymore.I felt more alone than I ever did, and it wasn't getting any easier as the years went on,"

"It doesn't mean you had to reach that point with what you did, Book," I tried to reason, "It didn't have to be this way with that man "

"But I thought that Merrick would have what I needed to take away my mortality," Booker said to me, finally facing me and having me the break in his eyes and all over his face, "I saw it as my only chance to no longer reliving those memories of my wife and sons."

"At the expense of the others?" I asked then him, being bold with him now since it still making sense, at least in my mind, that the others were in the crossfire of Booker trying to get rid of his Immortality.Booker wasn't that heartless, I never saw him that light.Just bitter and regretful of some things.However, this seemed a bit extreme, and it was devastating to hear that others were involved. 

But with Booker, the dam within him broke into a thousand pieces

"It was meant to only be me!" he bellowed, shaking as he screamed out.His voice rang out into the open field, a few of the chickens that were roaming around clucked in fright and curried away.I was quiet, not afraid of his outburst at all but was more heartbroken for him as he hid his face in his hands.Once the outburst was out of him, it felt like the rest of his energy was seeping away and floating into the air. 

"I was the only one who was meant to go in there with Merrick," Booker said into his hands, trying to breathe through every word he was saying, though I could hear it in his voice that it was hard to him to calm down, "I didn't know what Merrick was going to do and how he was going to do it, I swear! All I wanted was a way out and make all of this pain go away that I've had, and this seemed like the only chance I had.But Merrick changed his mind at the last minute and wanted all of us, not just me!"

"Booker…" I tried to start with him, but he kept going.

"But I never…ever …wanted either Joe or Nicky to be taken and used like that.I wanted that to be me, not them!" Booker explained to me, looking over at me and having me see that he was breaking down so badly that I thought he was going to hunch over.Finally, I reached over with the small space between us to place my hand on his face, moving him to look up at me and I saw all of the sadness, pain, and guilt in the orbs. 

"If there's one thing I know about you, is that you would never want to hurt either of them or Andy for that matter," I explained to him calmly, seeing him watch my every move, "But this could not have been the way to solve that,"

"I know," Booker blubbered out, trying to wipe his tears away before I could do it for him, "I made the stupidest decision in having all of them involved and almost killed because of me.If that would have happened, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.So, I know why they banished me for 100 years, and I was expecting more…but I was also hoping for less,"

I nodded, getting some of his hair out of his eyes and seeing him watch me now as if he was waiting for me to react to all that he told me.

"Don't you hate me?" He asked sheepishly, having me want to sigh.But I remained stoic for a moment or so before I shook my head once.

"There's no more room left in my heart or my life for hate," I reminded him, "Disappointed…yes.A bit angry because it involved Joe and Nicky.…of course.But hate….I can't hate you,"

"You should," Booker muttered in a groan.

"And since did I ever listen to you when you try to tell me what I should or should not do?" I challenged back cooly, now Booker giving me an uncertain look.I had to sigh already wanting to bounce booker out of the notion of wanting to self hate himself. 

“Booker,” I said his name calmly, “You cannot hate yourself for the next 100 years, it’s not right.I know what you did was wrong, and you know that as well.But to dwell on this heavily will be far worse for you.All you could do was move forward,”

“It’s harder than it sounds,” Booker admitted, sounding a bit better and I gave him a small smile.

“Of course it is,” I agreed, “But you have strength, Booker.We all know you do.You can and you will move forward, live out your exile, and then go back to the others.”

Booker nodded, leaning back in his chair and out of my embrace with him as I watched him sigh.All of this emotion that he was feeling was no longer heavy, at least it didn’t look like it to me.He seemed lighter after our talk and his rant, which to me seemed a bit better. Things were calming down again between both of us in our chairs, no longer wanting to talk about it again.I could tell he was already punishing himself for what he did and that last thing I wanted to do was to make it worse.I wasn’t gluten for punishment, I never was. Especially for someone like Booker who’s heart was tender.

“They miss you,” Booker said out of the blue, having me look at him.

“I do miss them too, Booker,” I agreed, but he shook his head.

“You know who I’m talking about,” He said, having me so quiet and feel a twinge of sadness.I nodded slowly, gulping slightly as Booker kept going, “They've been doing fine as they always do.But I can tell they miss you.Sometimes I see it in how they talk to each other over a meal or even how they go quiet after a long day.”

It pained me to hear that from Booker, of all people, but I knew he was telling the truth.Sometimes I would think if they were thinking of me.I thought of them all the time, almost every day.It wasn’t anything crazy or outlandish, just simple thoughts.Sometimes it got me through the day and or times it was a bit more solemn and depressing.

I thought of Yusuf when I would go horse riding in my younger years, teaching my sons how to ride and showing them how to hold the reigns and hug the horse with their legs.Yusuf would have shown them how to steer the horse with their legs and hips, a big grin on his face and laughter on his lips.He would try and make them laugh when they would cry, or hug them close to calm them when they got scared of the horses. 

I thought of Nicolò watching him making dinner from scratch.He was always concentrating and deep into any pasta he would make, tongue slightly sticking out as he would try to whisk a sauce with the right angle and speed, or even baked treats perfectly.Nicolò would have shown my boys how to bring ingredients together in the massive pot and show them how to season chicken with the right spices.He would be patient and gentle in his tone, read bedtime stories to them as they fell asleep in their beds, and even would sneak in pieces of chocolate when he knew I wasn't going to look.

Think of all of those small moments I never had with either one of them now was painful.I knew I made the right choice by being away from them both for the rest of my life, having no contact with either one of them.But then again, I always thought back to what if.What if I had one more chance to be with them?What if I had one more moment to hold their hands?To breathe in their unique scents, to kiss them.

What if?

Then again, my what if wouldn’t have brought me all of those moments where I felt beyond accomplished and I changed lives.Being in the Peace Corps, finding the Orphanage out in San Francisco, meting my husband.I wouldn’t have had Jash and his love in my life, which meant I wouldn’t have had my two beautiful sons.Alexander and Raj were my world, my entire world.I saw myself in their eyes and their heart, and I couldn’t bear to think of not having them in my life. 

Of course, I miss Nicolò and Yusuf and never stopped loving them, but I wasn’t regretting my choice.

“I miss them as well, Booker,” I said to him calmly as he was now watching me, “Some days have been hard and others not too bad.But I think of them, I think of all of you, every day.Ever since I left,”

“Do you regret it?” Booker questioned.

“No,” I answered simply, “I know what I did was right and what was needed.But I loved them,” Booker nodded his head, staying quiet as I pondered about it a bit more, “I still love them.”

“And they still love you,” Booker added, having me smiled briefly at him as he cleared his throat, “They even talked a few times to come and visit you to see how you were doing.Andy didn’t think it was a good idea because of what we agreed on, and I had to agree with her since we knew you needed your own space—“

“We might have to break that agreement sooner than later,” I interrupted him, seeing him look over at me now in confusion.I felt a cold sensation over my shoulders and in how I was talking to him that this was going to be another heavy subject to talk about. 

“What are you talking about, Adaline?” he asked, looking a bit concerned.I took in a long sigh, looking at him square in the eyes.

“I’m sick,” I explained simply, seeing him look at me with a bit of confusion. 

“What do you mean sick?” He asked, not understanding.It made it all the more worse for me since I was trying to make this both painless and almost declare. 

“I have cancer, Booker,” I answered, seeing him do nothing or say nothing as he was watching me.It took him a few long moments of just staring at me and not saying a word.I could only wait and see what he was going to say and how he was going to react.Finally, after a long moment, he breathed out an uneasy breath. 

Booker was trying to hold it together in front of me, I could see it in his body language and in how he was staring.But it was harder for him since he was already coming down from the emotional rant he went through mere minutes before.

“They found a tumor during an MRI check after I had an accident here at the house,” I explained, seeing him watch me intensely, “Because of my age and the placement of the tumor, the doctors think it would be dangerous for them to try and remove it,”

“So it’s a death sentence?” Booker asked, almost hoarsely. 

“I don’t see it that way,” I reasoned, though he was looking a bit more skeptical about the news I gave him, “I’m 85 years old, Booker.I lived my life and never regretted anything that I did, and all I could do now is let this happen,”

I was true: I was content on letting this happen.I know other people would be fighting for their life and bring to beat this sickness.I praised them for that and for that strength to do that.However, knowing that I was well into my elder years and I did all that I wanted to do in this life, there was no real sense in fighting what nature will do for the last few years of my life.Others wouldn’t be content with me, thinking that I was giving up.In my mind, I wasn’t giving up or surrounding to cancer, I was just content in all that I did and what I accomplished. 

“I think it’s brave,” Booker admitted to her, still looking a bit emotional.I was shocked by that statement, cocking my eyebrow at him.

“You do?” I asked, almost being sheepish.

“You’ve always been brave,” Booker explained, “From the moment I met you I knew you have bravery in you.You went through so much and lost so much before you became an Immortal, and I knew it must have been hard and unbearable at times.But you never gave up, I wish I had that kind of bravery.If I did, I would be a different person,”

“I’m too old for you to butter me up,” I joked with him mildly seeing him finally give me one of his infamous smirks. 

“It was a good old fashion try,” he snorted, in which I grinned widely at him.He then gave me a sincere look, reached over to place his hand on my arm and rub it softly, “Do you want me to contact the others?”

“If it’s not too much trouble,” I answered, “I don’t want to wait to tell them, and I’d rather tell them all in person than over the phone.They deserve an in-person conversation,”

“That they do,” Booker hummed, “I can arrange for it,”

“But aren’t you in exile with them?” I asked, figuring out that it might be the best case for Booker to go to them when he was not meant to be anywhere near them. 

“That CIA agent I told you about, Copley, he got a hold of me a little bit after I left the others and has been in contact with me in secret ever since.He’s working with them in keeping their identity a secret and finding them recon missions to do,”Booker explained, “I still communicate with him for anything I can do on my own, solo recon and small jobs.I can have him send the message to Andy and the others.Do you want me to have him say anything else for you?”

I paused, thinking that I should say yes.I wanted to tell them a lot of things since it’s been quite some time when I physically saw them.And from what I heard from Booker about them, I was so tempted to tell them things. 

To tell Andy that she was still strong though she lost her Immortality.I wanted to tell Nile, though I never met her yet, that she will be loved and protect by the group and will be being strong under their wing.Lastly, I wanted to tell Nicolò and Yusuf that I love them.I never stopped loving them, and they made the best impact in my life that no one else could ever understand or comprehend. 

Yet, I shook my head.

“I’ll tell them everything in person.”

* * *

Booker stayed on the farm for one more day, needing a day to unwind from all that we went through late that morning and get his head back in the right frame of mind.Booker was going to road trip across America and get to the East coast before he would head to back Europe and hide out there for some of his exile, hopping from place to place.He’s never seen a lot of America himself so he decided to drive by himself and see all that changed or stayed the same.I showed him around the property after we had lunch, telling him what I added and what was new.Booker loved how I’ve done the house, having me show him around the barn and the small animals that I had running around the place. 

Booker himself grew up on a farm when he was a child, so I could tell he was more of a natural with the farm life.He seemed at least, the tension in his shoulders disappeared and the sadness on his face was no longer evident while he was looking at the horses.I joked that if I was a bit younger we would go riding, though he rolled his eyes at me.

“I was shit at riding a horse,” he joked.

But what amazed me was seeing Booker gravitate to the litter of kittens that I had.There were 8 kittens altogether, one of which was gnawing at Booker’s show lace and tying to swat at him as I was showing him inside the barn.He grinned, reaching down to scoop up the kitten in his arm like a small loaf of bread and the kitten snuggling into him.Its fur was grey, almost wiry at the touch as Booker’s face was a pinch brighter, having me watch with a sweet smile as he was rubbing its head with his thumb and cracking a smile.

“How about you keep him,” I suggested as he looked at me, almost a bit surprised.

“Really?” He asked, having me nod at him.

“He’s big enough to be away from his mother now, fully weaned, and I think you need someone to be your road trip buddy.Plus, I know you’ll take very good care of him, and he’ll take care of you,” I explained, seeing that warm blossom on his cheeks.I knew I had to give him some kind of peace offering in all of this despair and sadness he was going through.Although I could tell he knew he was at fault, I could tell too he needed to get away from it and focus on himself. 

Booker looked back down at his new pet, the little kitten loved back up at him and meowed.It was a pipsqueak of a sound as Booker chuckled, bringing him up to nuzzle into him without thinking twice. 

“What will you name him?” I asked as he was still looking down at the cat. He though for a solid second before he looked back at me.

“Jean Pierre,” he replied.

* * *

“You know where you’re going?”

“Of course, I ordered a navigator for my rental car.Now, are you sure you want me to tell them the code word?I won’t be able to take it back once I do,”

“You have my blessing,”

Booker and I stood outside of his Uber car that was waiting to take him to the Car Rental shop.It was early the next morning, and after getting Booker a good breakfast and some fresh clothes I had from my adult sons that were close to his size, I knew it was time to let him go and be on his own.Once he was a few hours out of town, he would call from my burner phone to Copley and relay the message to the group just to make sure he wasn’t going to be traced back to me. 

Booker told me which cities he was going to hit on his cross country road trip with little Jean Pierre at his side, who was attached to him and loved him already.Booker seemed a bit brighter since I saw him two nights before when he came to the house half-drunk and broken.I knew he wasn’t fully healed, but it was a start.

“Let me know when you get to the first town and you’re safe,” I said to him as Booker was cradling Jean Pierre in his hand.Booker nodded his head, having me grin at him and lean over to plant a kiss on his cheek.

“If I do that, you let me know when….when it’s close to being time for you,” Booker asked me, sounding a bit hesitant on the subject, “I want to be able to pay my respects.”

“You’ll get a word,” I reassured him, seeing him nod as he leaned over to hug me.I hugged him back, the both of us were trying to avoid squishing the kitten that he was cradling close as I chuckled against his head. 

“Remember, my dear Sebastian, you are stronger than you think,” I said to him with kindness and with love.He said nothing, but I knew he was affected by what I said to him.But he had to know and he had to hear it from someone who was in his life in a sense.I didn’t know how the others were reacting when it came to him, nor was it my right to know.All I knew was that Booker needed reassurance that his life was worth living for. 

“ _Merci,_ ” He replied against my hold, “Love you, Adaline,”

“Love you too, Booker,”

* * *

I watched him drive away in the Uber, Jean Pierre in his lap as they were going down the gravel and out of my life.I knew it was going to be the last time I would see Booker before I died, or that was the assumption.I wanted to make sure it was positive and gentle, nothing to be sad about to be filled with worry.I stood there alone in front of the farmhouse, watching the world keep turning around me as I breathed in the cool morning air, filling my lungs and telling myself that all will be well. 

All was well when I joined the group as a young naive girl, thinking I had no self-worth in a group of warriors.But all four of them showed me that it wasn’t the case at all. They brought out that strength and hope in me, hope that not all was lost.Andy showed me how to fight, Booker shows me how to be optimistic.

Yet it was Nicolò and Yusuf who showed me true love. 

I owe them both my life, all of it, because they showed me how love was supposed to be.All I knew from love before was tainted, bleak, and superficial.However, those two men were showing love as kindness, gentleness, pure, and beyond romantic.Love can change a patron, and it changed me. 

I turned on my heel and walked back into the house, anticipating the moment I would see the group again.


End file.
